Mary Travers

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Fair Fighting Rules For Relationships

The struggle is normal within a long-term relationship, but if you fight acting out of revenge? In the struggle to bring the revenge could come from fighting escalated a negative reaction to a marriage, because they can destroy spiral into anger and frustration. Or do you want to avoid fighting too? If there is no fighting, as long as no beer brewing resentments boil and eat on the relationship like a cancer.

There is a solution for this and it begins by fighting fair, and adherence to theseThe following basic rules.

The Rules of Fighting Fair
Stay in control. Keep your voice calm and use statements like: "I feel diminished when you say that my work say does not matter," instead of: "It's always," "I am the only one who does not work around here , never not "and" You. " Call your partner names, not imitate, threats or ultimatums. In short, not to say that harsh words can not be withdrawn.
Fight Fight of the children in the private, not outside inthe street. In addition, do not fight against the children.
Keep it relevant. Not to insults from a decade ago. Keep the argument on the point, be specific and have a goal in mind, why do you fight in the first place. Try to deal with one question at a time. Your goal should be win-win and / or should involve a compromise.
Use your active listening. Ask your partner to share his views, while listening carefully and not interrupt. Then formulate what did your partner, especially inManner, so that he / she knows that you understand what brought expressed.
Have a time limit for the fight. I agree that your will have to fight with a certain breakpoint, so you do not, the argument that the implementation are in your working hours or the next week.
Not back. Did not go from a fight on foot, this is not a coward and repaired. If you need a break, the fight is ok, but after the time out of your resume.
Do you appreciate the other person, if necessary. Confirm if the other is located directly on thethe question so that you can use more if your criticism partner.And Finally, you and your partner should be able to resolve conflicts as quickly and not wait until the time is ripe. If you are both so busy a time for discussion is available if both of you, both mentally and physically. Fight fair is the smart way to protect your long-term relationship and your personal needs expressed.

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January 7, 2010 - Posted by | Mary Travers Articles | ,

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